Obama Backtracks, Cancels Massive Birthday Party on Cape Cod

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Former President Barack Obama is currently pouting in the corner like a sad little boy. Wh; because he’s had to cancel the massive birthday party he had planned at his mansion on Cape Cod.

The party was set to have over 500 guests and 200 staff; news of it coming up got the internet ablaze with controversy. After all, isn’t the Delta variant leaking out now and we’re told that we should all be going back to the social distancing and so on?


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The organizers said the party would be outside and follow “all public health guidelines,” but it’s clear that the pressure just got too much for this former awful president. So he did what Obama always does in the face of pressure: he backed down.

Why Did Obama Back Down?

Representatives for the Obamas said that the rise of the “delta variant” is what made them “scale back” the upcoming party so it will just be for “close friends” and a few family members.

Just an idea, but maybe the Obamas could reschedule the original large party elsewhere, such as at Bohemian Grove in California? I’m sure they could have fun drinking rosé next to the huge Moloch statue.

We all know why the party is cancelled: it’s because it took the public backlash for Obama to even realize how stupid this would be. He’s so elitist and out of touch with what’s going on in this country for normal Americans.

Obama barely even realized how horrible it would look to invite nearly a thousand people to his oceanfront property to celebrate him turning 60. If anything, the rest of us would rather celebrate the day he left office.

The man was a national disgrace in the Oval Office and we’d all like to forget him.

Details of the New Party

Not much is known about the rescheduled party, except that it will now happen this weekend instead of on Wednesday as planned.

It’ll be interesting to see who counts as a “close friend.” Will George Clooney and Oprah still show up as planned? What about Biden?

Maybe if we’re lucky we’ll get some footage from the party of the two of them chumming around while our country suffers in confusion and lack of leadership.

What better image of Democrat hypocrisy than a bunch of elite liberals drinking wine and celebrating Obama while thousands of illegal immigrants per day pour across our southern border?

What better representation of the rottenness at the core of our federal government to see these men and women have fun and relax as the economy stumbles and people worry for their family’s future while being forced to take an experimental vaccine?

I’m glad Obama canceled the big birthday, and that’s the last I want to hear of this idiot turning 60.